Sorry about that...

For some unknown reason, my blog decided to post on its own. I'll just continue on...

I stopped doing the "next right thing." I've been so sick with myself. I haven't been in the Word, I haven't talked to Jesus, I have shut myself off from the people in my life that I love so much. I've been in hiding. It's been a very painful couple of weeks.

Well, as of tonight, I have 2 days sober. I'm starting over....AGAIN. Someone told me that it's not how many times you fall, but how many times you get back up. That's what I'm doing. I'm getting back up. I've been in the Word tonight. I've been listening to my favorite praise and worship station. I have been fed tonight. God has shown His love to me tonight. He has encouraged me through the music and some wonderful messages on Youtube. The ladies here at the shelter have blessed me.

Right now, I'm living , not day by day, but minute by minute. I'm powerless over this addiction. But I have a God who has the power to set me free once again. I pray that I will start doing the next right thing again.

Kim

I'm at work and it's 1:30 in the morning. I'm waiting on a new client to come into the shelter in moment. Throughout the last year that I've been working here, I've seen so many women and children come and go. I think I have the best job. It's been such a blessing to me. Sharing with these women helped me stay sober many months. In AA, they teach us that in order to keep what we have, we must be willing to give it away. God has been so faithful to me. He has delivered me. I just want to give back what has been given to me. I'll keep on doing just that as long as I'm allowed to.

The last 2 weeks has been a struggle for me. I've taken my eyes off of Jesus. I quit doing what I know to do. I've spent the last 15 months doing what I know will keep me sober. I stopped. I let the worries, the deep deep hurt in my heart, take my eyes off Jesus. I stopped doing the "

I'm Trying...

I haven't posted in awhile. I really haven't had anything to say. I've sat down several times to type, but just couldn't make anything happen. Hopefully I'm not the only one who has this problem. I have SO much going on in my life right now. It's really very overwhelming sometimes. I think most of the time I'm strong and hold up well, but then some days, it seems to be more than I can bear. Another reason I haven't posted anything is b/c it's hard to put yourself out there and not know who might read these thoughts in my head. It seems like my mind has been a dangerous place lately. I guess I've just kept these thoughts in my own head. I still have nothing to say really, but I wanted to at least put something down tonight.

I have been reading lots of different blogs to find encouragement. It's helpful sometimes...most of the time. I don't really have anyone to tell my thoughts to totally at this point.

Anyway, I will keep going. I'll keep trying to stay strong.

Kim

SCHOOL IS OUT!!

I am so excited today that I can hardly stand it. I'M THROUGH WITH SCHOOL FOR THE SUMMER!!! I actually feel very weird this morning. I feel like I should be doing something....studying, reading, worrying about a test or SOMETHING. I think I will enjoy myself for about a week. I'm going to be lazy, watch some Lifetime, eat with some friends, go to the movie with my daughter. I think I deserve it.

Kim